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Uggh, my hair is preeeTy damn Oogly today. It hasn't stopped snowing at all, and it began last nite. I'm feelin' a bit pissed-off rite now and hungry and tired. maybe i will go and eat sumthing, go out for a kawfEE or whuddevir.
I've been at the computer all day and authorizing visa purchases over the fone.
I hate automated not-real people. durr. The guy's voice at the visa thing wuz like,
"U SeEm tO bE haViNg TrubbiL, pleeeeeze stay on the line and an opOratiR will be wif u shortly." Ffuk you message man!!! I am SO not having trubbles it's all these freakin' numbers 4500....fgjkbr dujkbfjk v. Okey-doo, time for break. Wow, it's 1 43 pm, my, the time flies when yer bizzy doing meaningless tasks.

I went grocery shopping wif my mum tonite at Loblaws. We don't go out much together anymore. but when we do I like to pretend i'm her autistik daughter or i am retarded, have ADHD, or whutever...she tries to take off on me when i am not looking. I found this big bouncy ball and followed her frum the butcher to the bakery...to the dairy section. I kept bouncing it against the cart and the back of her knees so it would make her knees pop forward. She asked to see the ball and then launched it far, far away into an aisle wth a fierce kick. " the more you resist mum, the more i dish it out." so, she continued to ignore my stoopid acts. Everytime She asked me to grab an item off a shelf i would bend down with my plumber's crack to pick it up. still no response. meh. Oh yea, i forgot to mention that i grabbed this cream-coloured blanket frum off the couch and wore that insted of a jacket. No, not in that sexy, pashmina style...think, Granny style...yes, that's more like it. My mum was not impressed with that. "HEy, I was comfortable watching Seinfeld! You're the one who asked if i wanted to come!" Also, my hair was all sticking out and looks real dark today. My mum wants me to be a blond. whuddevir. Then I found wun of them slinky animal slinkies. I walked arownd bopping my mum on the head with it and getting it all tangled up and ruined so she had to pay for it. harF!! We then passed the display of these Elmo dolls that are electronic and move around when you pinch their hands. OH BOY!!! I got them all going and exclaimed;"Hey mom, look at that!" I turn to see my mom zipping away and like two cashiers giving me dirty looks. hummph. Throo all of dis, my mum STILL would not react. Until........
we get to the check-out lane and the Titanik themeSong comes on over the soundsystem and I jump onto our cart, and lipsynch to the part, "WE'LL STAyyyyyyyyyy......, fffFOREVER THIS WAY!!!!!! YOU WILL STAY IN MY HEART AND MY HEART WILL GO ON AND OooooooooHHHH!!!!!!!!" using my coke bottle as a microfone. by then, I had generated a small audience. So, my mom grabs my arm and hisses, "That's IT! GO WAIT IN THE KAR!!!" and so i did. but, i made sure to kiss these two plastik santa lawn ornaments on my way out.

Dis morneeNg on the bus, I sat wif wun of my childhood playmates. Wuz gud. Gave me a chance to talk about myself and what i am up to now and whut i am gunna do wif my life, what i've dun in the past. I like doing that. talking about me. Ahh...He sat there, nodding and listening intently. Well, he DID still have his earfones in so i guess it is possible that he wasn't listening to me at all. meh. His stop came b4 mine and so as he got up to leave I kalled out,

"BYE! SeE YOU TomoRRow When There'LL be More time to Talk About ME !"
nyuk nyuk.

MAn, sumtimes I can be A Rite Laff! Tho' I also enjoy listening to others ramble on and on about themselves too. CuZ then i know it's almost MY turn to talk next. i luv that. ramble ramble RAAAAmble
...........

Me gud.

I ate the worst ever, Egg salad sandwich this morning. What was moreso worse about it wuz that i had to eat it in 2 minutes, between union station and college.
Uggh. I didn't realize it tasted so rank until I swallowed it all down. It must've had a spoonful of curry in it.
I bought it frum this chinese vendor guy. His wife was there reading a book. When her friend came up ( i assume they were frendz cuz they spoke to one-another in chingLish [half english, half chinese] ).
Their conversashun went sumthing like this:
"Oi, sum tai gi woo, chin gruzz-wahhh Bagel gella CremCheese Oke, doIken awwww waaa."
"ahh dollar tWentee..meeee sooomach sssing buttalay."

Oh, har har, I slay me!

I had to run like an Effing chikken wif its head cut-off all the way to The train, today. I had to sit on the stairs until Cooksville cuz NObuddY was gettin' off. dammit. I was all sweaty and smelly and greasy cuz i wore four layers today and that run fucked me rite over. Everyone was trying to get up the stairs and past me to look for a seat. "Dammit, if there was a seat up there, I wouldn't be sitting on these dirty steps!" Biatch. I'll probably get hemmorhoids now. Another thing, I wore longjohNs too and they're made up of this itchy wool-material and for sum reason, everytime i wear 'em underneath jeans and i sit on a hard surface My asS starts to itch itch itch. I was trying to scratch and not be so obvious but everyone was watchin' like they always are on the train.

this is where I am sippose to say i am going to give up smoking cuz phlegm build-ups aren't worth it Anymore........meh --The day i wake up in the morniN' and Koff up sum tar, is the day I give up smokin'

Today, December 6/00-- is the ann. of the montreal massacre.

One good thing to do when you are working but you don't know what the fuck you are doing is to get a bunch of papers and make a huge mess and then shuffle that around for a while and go "aksdjhfakjsdhfamnbdskaiueroiqwyerjabsdfabsdfnx,mvbiwoweadfanx" on the keyboard. I kind of felt like that at work today so I am going back tomorrow with office supplies to do it right. Hey Raymi? You want to be pen pals like in the regular mail? I have a post office box so I don't even have to worry about you and Ward showing up at my house. Actually, that would be really cool if you did! Come over! It's fun to have people over my house because we set up hammocks inside and then we sleep in the hammocks so the visitors can have the huge bed. Maybe I'll get one of those special banana hammocks that zip up so I can stuff you in it and then make it flip over. that is so fun cuz you can't fall out, see?

By laura Petrie. this is what she sed to me when i told her i was feeling sorta useless in the office and counter-productive.

I want for xmas a vintage bathing suit, ciRca 1920-1930's to hide my snatch hair so i won't have to shave down there, ever-ever again. I want for it to be a sparkly navy blue. Oooh, with a matching bathing cap, to boot. yeh. real swell. Hawt-diGGity.

There's this guy who kums into h.h. quite often in the a.m. He had a Lobotomy two years ago. He woks thru the whole store, going up and down every aisle, looking at every product in-depth. Since he's had a chunk of his brain removed, it's eFFed-uP his memorY a tad so, everytime he comes in the store, for him it's like the very first time. That's why he takes so long looking at everyDamNthing. He scares the other customers away. I always avoid him cuz he rambles on and on about sum hardware store his dad owned and when he was a lil boy he worked in it. I made the mistake once of smiling and nodding my head. Never again. He never buys anything. The woman who watches over him and all the other whackos he lives wif gave us her number to kall if he gets out-of-hand.

I did two stoopid things today:

I tried to tie my shoe on the streetcar during rushHour when it's all crowded with bodies. While i was down there in a semi squatting-dawg position, the streetcar turned the corner, I tipped over onto my side and fell into this old lady's feet. My pants got all wet and dirty and everyone got all pissed cuz my fall made them shift and have to touch one-another. hmmph, i sez.

As mentioned previously, I consumed a fries Supreme frum Taco SmeLL at 10 am. Oversight on my part.

The coffeeshop which i frequent on Parliament St. is filled wif hot lookin' people who have this gritty, rockstar edge. I think i go there so often cuz it seems like a fine pLace to 'mac those of the opposite sex. Yet, then i remember all the straight guys are Oogly and all the hot ones are gay. Sumtimes i am hopelessly stupid. Ahem. Don't get the wrong idea, I am no homoPhobe. sum mite call me a fagHag. whuddevir. Fags are Fun.

I'm finding out rite about now, why it's not a gud idea to scarf down a fries supreme, three lattes, a greek salad, coke, and hit a Chinese Buffet all in one day. Oooogh. This is how Ward and I celebrated his birfday:

He picks me up frum kipling station, drives around aimlessly until i figger out whut i wanna eat, we go to chinese buffet, Afterwards i buy hairdye, we go to his howse, Ward dyes my hair. THe End.

On sunday (yesterday? hrrmm) at home hardware, i had to kall this other location and ask if they had the Sanyo soundsystem that wuz on sale in the flyer, but i kalled it a 'ghettoBlaster' insted of a 'soundsystem' and the grrl on the other line was like,
"Doii, wuzzA GheetoBlaster!?"
sheeet. stoopid sheltered girl. Don't even remember the barbie and ken and their black chikk friend when they went b-boy style and each had their own ghettoBlasters. barbie's wuz pink.

Tomorrow is Ward's b-day. Happy Birfday, ward!

oh my god, how weird, my posts are showing up hours before yurs cuz of the time difference? is that right?

Don'tcha just wanna take her over yer knee !

Oh yeah.
There that walking streak of sex is now.
(applaud. applaud).

shit. i eFfed up.
sorry.

hello everyone! hello my dear adoring fans! I wish I could give each and every one of you a hug. I love you all and I thank you for making me who I am today! is this thing on?

I keep wondering if i'm sad
because i'm pissed-off or if i'm
pissed-off because i'm sad.

I got in a pursefight in snr. kindeegarden and also a catfite in gr.9 on the last day at that wretched catholik highSkOOL.

A month ago at home hardware, i was opening this box and i guess i did it too fast cuz the edge of the flap slit my right wrist, diagonally. I had this awesome scar for two weeks. it's gone now.
durr.